I Do Feel All Ways Tired

Monday, February 22, 2010 12:14 AM, EST

"I don't feel no ways tired. I've come too far from where I started from. Nobody told me that the road would be easy, but I don't believe God brought me this far to leave me."

Our choir was singing this when I entered service ten minutes late after speaking to MG's nurse on the phone. She had a rough morning, desatting into the single digits (Our oxygenation levels are at 100, hers on a good day don't dip below 80). The nurse said they would try everything not to reintubate her but MG looked pale and ashen too. This possibility hung over me the entire service and sure enough as I was leaving church, our attending doctor called to tell me after a very difficult few hours, they had reintubated her. The fellow and attending had failed to do it so an ear, nose, and throat specialist was called in with a videoscope in order to guide the tube through the blocked airway below her vocal chords. They have started steriods to help the inflammatio

n of her airways and also given her a transfusion to help her color and her blood carry oxygen better.

The good news is that she is breathing comfortably at very low settings on the vent. The doctor is hopeful that her episodes this weekend were caused more by an obstructed airway than worsening lungs. They will use steriods and possibly laser surgery to treat the inflammation and scar tissue that has developed as a result of having the tube for so long. We hope this works well and we can start again with weaning and extubation in another week.

Nobody told me that the road would be easy, but nobody can prepare you for how hard it really is. I am thankful for the music we sang in church that acknowledged this quality of our trials. It helped that it was the first Sunday of Lent. Or at least, it helped me; Sundays still disagree with Margaret. She'll probably sleep in and skip service as a teenager...

BW

David and James met me at the hospital when they finished at Marble. I posted a photo of him trying to hold her hand. He's given her the dinosaur name, Deinonychus, which means "terrible claw."